Let’s finish up! The somber mood of Yom HaShoahis behind us, so we can now return to the frivolous insanity of Eurovision preparations and review the final nine entries.
- Serbia: how low can you go? Nice blond Jewfro, though. I wonder if anyone has ever analyzed the use of an accordion in Eurovision entries, and its effect on the final placement. This will get votes, though, just because it is so outrageous.
- Slovakia: inoffensive and forgettable. Will only get votes from regional neighbors.
- Slovenia: what’s with all the chamber music instruments fronting bands? The only upside is that the singer doesn’t come in until halfway through the number.
- Spain: a real contender this year. No more boy-bands (2007) or joke entries (2008). Spain brought in the big guns with Soraya, who is adorable and is almost wearing a dress. Expect to hear this on all the dance charts.
- Switzerland: another anonymous garage band that could have come from Iowa. No leiderhosen, no yodeling, no cow bells. Boring!
- Turkey: let’s face it, Turkey has become a major power player in Eurovision. With Sertab’s win a few years ago, they’ve been consistently strong. This year they give us Hadise (pronounced kha DEESH eh, I think, but any Turkish linguists out there can correct me), who is already a huge star (sort of Turkey’s answer to Beyonce). This is definitely a top-five entry and will be on all the dance charts throughout Europe.
- Ukraine: oh-so-kinky! Svetlana is doing nasty stuff with that chocolate. Love it.
- United Kingdom: well, at least they aren’t entering a joke song this year, but while it is pleasant, it is as interesting as vanilla ice cream.
So, you still haven’t check them all out! No excuses:
Eurovision Song Contest – Moscow 2009 Preview Player
And that was SOFTball??? Yikes.